5/30/12
In my previous post, I introduced Doobius Maximus, the dog we are watching for my parents. Not only is Doobs obese, he is epileptic, and must take pills in the morning and at night. These pills make him really, really thirsty and he has to drink water all night long. This doesn't seem like a problem, and it shouldn't have been - but it is the introduction to the worst 10 hours I've had in a long time.
10:00 PM - Doobie starts panting heavily, signaling he's thirsty. I show him the water inside. He isn't having it, so he waits by the door until I let him out.
11:00 PM - I go to unload the hamper in the bathroom, and water starts spraying everywhere. I'm too tired to deal with it, so I just turn off the main valve and figure I'll deal with it in the morning.
12:00 AM - I'm asleep, happily.
12:10 AM - Doobie comes into our room for the first time, panting and making "I HAVE TO GO POOP" doggy noises. I let him out. He doesn't poop.
1:00 AM - Isla comes crying into the room, she falls asleep.
1:30 AM - Doobie comes in again, repeat of the same. No poop. I leave the door open.
2:00 AM - Doobie comes in and lays down next to my side of the bed. He sounds like a freight train.
2:45 AM - A small earthquake wakes me up - whatever, it's california. But for some reason, this reminds Doobie that he has to poop, and even though the door's open he must need me to hold his hand or something.
3:00 AM - I remember that the door is open when 50 mosquitoes dive bomb my face.
3:45 AM - Isla, who is sleeping backwards on the bed, wakes up and announces that she has peed all over the place. We strip the bed, throw the sheets outside in the laundry, and attempt to sleep again.
4:30 AM - I'm asleep again, finally.
5:45 AM - Isla wakes up
6:10 AM - Miles wakes up - I silently curse my lot in life.
7:00 AM - I attempt to feed Doobie his morning pill. He doesn't eat his food. Miles and Isla are both screaming about something completely unrelated. I have no idea the reasoning behind either.
7:10 AM - I remember that there are people coming to work on the yard today, so I have to pick up the dog poop in the backyard, which now contains Doobie's outrageous leavings. As I do this, Sophie, our little pit mix, eats Doobies food containing the epilepsy pill. In my rush to stop her, I put my hand on the poop side of the shovel.
7:20 AM - I try to wash my hand in the sink, forgetting that I turned off the main valve. So, I turn on the main valve, not remembering that water was spraying all over the place. Water sprays all over the place.
7:40 - I give the right dog the right pill - call to make sure I shouldn't force Sophie to puke or something equally disgusting, and attempt to entertain a still- screaming son.
7:45 - I fall asleep while Miles naps. Isla wakes me up 5 minutes later to ask me what color eyes Doobie has. I cry.
this was thoroughly entertaining. thank you for reminding me to take in the selfish moments of non-family living. though, I do look forward to the days when I can call you about my stories such as above, and you can laugh.
ReplyDeleteI love Doobie - if I ever did have a dog - it would be him, even though he tried to lap up all of my blood off the cement where I lay half unconscious when I fell off Dad-dee-o's hammock that he intentionally placed a jagged rock under at his half moon rising house or whatever the name of it was. My husband tried to drag me away from Dooblie - but no go. It was the day before Thanksgiving and I got a lot of attention with a bandage on my head that yummy day. Plus I got to learn about all of the other Thanksgiving mishaps the emergency room doctor at Ojai Hospital tended too that week, as he stitched up my broked dog licked head. I love Dooblie.
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